


Dib X Reader – The Enemy of my Enemy

by writeyouin



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fluff, Reader-Insert, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 06:17:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20385037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writeyouin/pseuds/writeyouin
Summary: Request - Hi, I don’t know if you still do Invader Zim asks, but I’d like to request a Dib x Irken Reader please. Maybe you could make the reader stranded on earth, being sent by the Tallests when she/he realized ruling over height is idiotic, with only a Pak and a disguise that’s similar to Taks. She/he would like to get back at her/his race, so she/he makes a deal with Dib. If they expose Zim, she/he will get his ship to leave and reek havoc on her/his planet. Or something like that... Thanks!





	Dib X Reader – The Enemy of my Enemy

You kicked your ship, furious to have crash-landed on the inferior Earth-planet that you had been sent to conquer. Not once in your invader career had you ever crashed, until that stupid creature hit your ship and sent you hurtling into a tree.

“Dumb bee,” You growled, though you didn’t really know what a bee was, only that it was the thing that had thrown you off course with its insignificant, disproportionate body; such a creature shouldn’t have been able to fly in the first place, let alone crash a ship.

Despite the set-back, you were determined to complete your mission quickly so as to please the Almighty Tallest.

“Computer,” You addressed your ship, glad for the privacy of the forest you’d crashed in and the cover of night. “Disguise yourself as an appropriate habitation-unit.” The ship reformed, replicating a perfect log-cabin. You stepped into the house, examining its interior with your tech-pad.

Walking to a mirror in what appeared to be the cabin’s sleeping quarters, you gave another command. “Good. Now, upload an appropriate disguise to my Pak.”

You watched as an icky human disguise covered your wonderful antennae and green skin. Turning slowly to get a good look at yourself, you sneered, “Ugh, it will have to do I suppose, if this is what the humans count as acceptable evolution.”

“Computer, begin immediate repairs and locate target: Zim.”

“Located,” The computer replied mechanically, an obedient servant created by the Irkin Empire. “Target: Zim is in location Skool.”

“Hmm, then I shall infiltrate this ‘_Skool_’ and capture Target: Zim. What defences is this Skool equipped with?”

“Zero defences detected.”

You grinned; this was going to be easier than you thought, like taking nutrions from a grubling.

* * *

“Class,” Ms. Bitters glowered in her croaky old voice, “this is (Y/N), our new student. NOW GET TO YOUR SEAT!”

You opted for a chair just a few spaces away from Zim, afraid he would recognise a disguise Pak, even when his was so clearly defective. You rolled your eyes bemusedly; his disguise wasn’t even a hologram.

While Ms. Bitters began her lecture on a doomed Earth, you speculated on your gathered information of the unusual planet you were to conquer. Ms. Bitters for example was extremely tall by Irken standards and would have been at least a commander on your planet; she certainly had the demeanour for war. Yet, on Earth, Ms. Bitters was nothing more than a Skool teacher. Initially, you’d thought that was a position of respect, and though many of the humans she taught did fear her, they did not care about any punishments that might come their way for misbehaving in her presence. Was it possible that height did not dictate height on this unusual planet? If so, how did the earthlings choose their leaders? It couldn’t be the smallest; that would make no sense at all.

Pushing thoughts of taking over the Earth away temporarily, you focussed on the first half of your mission, capturing Zim. Looking at him, it couldn’t be that hard. He had the lowest ranking technology you’d ever seen come from Irken hands. Moreover, from the reports you’d read, Zim was chaotic, but not necessarily intelligent.

While you glared intently at Zim who wasn’t paying attention, Dib’s sharp eyes tracked you, following your every movement.

‘_Finally,_’ Dib thought. ‘_Another human who sees the elephant in the room, or rather the alien in the class._’

Dib snickered at his own joke. ‘_Alien in the class… Hilarious. Argh, focus Dib, we can joke later._’

“Psst,” He beckoned under his breath.

You turned sharply to the small human to your left, tilting your head to show you were listening.

“You’re interested in Zim?”

You blinked slowly, revealing nothing about your mission.

“He’s an alien,” Dib hissed. “Sent here to take over the planet. Don’t listen to the others here, they call me crazy, I’m not. Zim. Is. An. Alien. And I, Dib Membrane will do anything in my power to stop him.”

“Sit down Dib,” Ms. Bitters warned without turning from the blackboard, sensing rather than seeing that he was posing heroically again since he hadn’t done so in the last period.

Dib slumped back down in his chair while the rest of the class laughed at him uproariously. While they mocked the Membrane boy, you turned your attention back to Zim, who was smiling triumphantly, as if he’d won another victory against Dib. You wondered whether Zim was so careless in his act that he’d been found out by Dib, or whether Dib was so intelligent that it was inevitable he’d discovered Zim and the Irkin plot. If it was the former, you had nothing to worry about, but the idea of the latter caused you concern over your brooding classmate.

Then again, perhaps Dib could be useful, if you played your yomboes right. Had the bell not rang then, you would have cornered either Dib or Zim. However, you didn’t get a chance as Dib screamed Zim’s name and started chasing him from the classroom in an impressive feat of acrobatics and speed. You assumed this was a regular occurrence, judging by the lack of reaction from the rest of the class; then again, maybe most humans were simply that ignorant. Either way, you had a lot to think about.

* * *

Dib stood outside what he believed to be your house, having no reason to suspect that you were an alien, since you acted more normal than Zim or Tak ever could. In one hand he held a flower and in the other a pamphlet on how to be a paranormal investigator.

He liked you. You listened to him when nobody else would and when he told you Zim was an alien, you didn’t mock him, instead you got closer to him, asking if he had any plans to stop Zim. After that, he’d given you the entire power-point presentation that he one day planned to show his dad – and all the other scientists of the world, of course.

“Okay Dib,” He whispered to himself. “Just knock, give (Y/N) the flower and pamphlet, then ask if (s)he’ll help you defeat Zim. It’s not that hard. Just don’t overthink it.”

Before Dib could go through with his plan, he heard a crash in the cabin. Taken aback, he ran around the side of the house, peeking through one of the windows. There you were, having flipped a table in anger.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE CAN’T LEAVE?!” You roared.

Dib looked around for whoever you were talking to, perhaps a parent or sibling. Instead, he heard the all too familiar sounds of a super-computer, talking back at you.

“Systems are damaged beyond repair. Ship requires Irken flargon to fly.”

You threw your Pak to the ground shedding your disguise. “I DON’T HAVE A FLARGON. I DON’T HAVE MY ROBOT. I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING THAT CAN FIX YOU.”

Before you turned to the window, Dib ducked down, furious at himself for missing yet another alien. He looked at the daisy in his hand, crushing it in a despondent fist. Fine, if he couldn’t fight crime with you, he could at least stop you from taking his planet.

When he was sure you were looking away, he tried stealthily opening the window to climb in. Instead, all he managed to do was grunt and make far too much noise when he found that the window didn’t open as he first suspected.

“DANG IT!” He cried, losing his temper. He looked inside again, finding the cabin empty. “What?”

You growled behind him, lifting him into the air with a tractor beam and holding him firmly in place so he couldn’t fight you; he was far too skilled in combat to take any other risk.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!” Dib cried out. “YOU’RE AN ALIEN!”

“I prefer intergalactic traveller, if you don’t mind,” You replied drily.

“WHAT’S YOUR PLAN, ALIEN, HUH? YOU GOING TO MIND CONTROL EVERYONE THROUGH THEIR T.V’S, IS THAT IT? WHAT ABOUT CREATING GHOST CLONES?”

You waited patiently while Dib listed off all the supposedly evil things you were expected to do, until he finally ran out of breath. “You done?”

Dib scowled at you but said nothing further.

“Okay, listen to me for a minute. I’m not here to take over Earth… Well, I was, but I’m not anymore. All I want to do is stop Zim, and then I can take his ship and go home. For all I care, you can have Zim to do what you want with.”

“Your whole race takes everything they want, why don’t you want Earth?” Dib asked suspiciously.

“Look Dib, you’re smart, so I’m going to be perfectly honest with you,” You freed Dib from the tractor beam, lowering him gently to the floor. “I don’t want to be an invader. I want to live here on Earth, like you and if that means donning a disguise for the rest of my life, so be it.”

“If you want to live here, why do you need Zim’s ship?”

“Because, I want to stop the Tallest from taking over anymore planets and I can’t do that from here. I’ve spent my life believing their lies, believing that we _needed_ the planets we stole, and believing that they were the smartest of our race, until I came to Earth. I’ve learned so much here. You get the freedom to pick your leaders, and you use your intellect to build incredible things instead of stealing your technology like we do. So, I’m only going to ask once, will you help me fix the mistakes of my past and work with me to stop the Tallest from taking over any more planets?”

If what you were saying was true then you were far more admirable than any other Irken Dib had heard of. Yet, no matter what you said, Dib was afraid of being tricked by you; what if this was all another Irken lie like everything else he’d seen?

“Prove to me that you’re telling the truth,” Dib said, glowering at you.

You considered his request, wondering what you could do or say that might prove your loyalty. It was a tricky request but you didn’t blame him for making it. If the roles were reversed, you wouldn’t trust an invader either. “Follow me,” You said solemnly.

You led the way into the Cabin, stepping into a pantry that was actually a lift to your underground laboratory. You pulled up a hologram of the Irken chain of command, lecturing Dib all the while. “These,” You pointed to the Almighty Tallest, “are our leaders. They sent me, Invader 153 to capture Target: Zim.”

“Why? Does he know something? Has he defected? Was his mission a failure?”

“What? No, none of that stuff. The Tallest just really hate him…he keeps calling them in the shower and stuff. It’s very annoying.”

“You… You’re kidding right?”

“I wish I was. You see, this is exactly what I meant when I said I wanted to be free of the Tallest… especially _Purple_.”

“What’s wrong with Purple?”

You glared at Dib, not prepared to tell him your shameful secret, the one that made you a top invader and allowed you access to the best technologies; it was something you wanted to take to your grave.

“Hey,” Dib pointed angrily at you, “You better tell me, or we can’t work together. What’s up with you and purple?”

“ARGH, INCESSANT HUMAN! I’M GIVING YOU CLASSIFIED INFORMATION FOR YOU TO BEAT THE IRKEN RACE. WHY ISN’T THAT ENOUGH FOR YOU?!”

“IF YOU DIDN’T WANT ME TO KNOW THEN YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE SAID ANYTHING. WHAT’S UP WITH PURPLE?”

To be fair, Dib had a point, though you were loath to admit it. You ground your teeth together frustratedly.

“Tell me, or I’ll take you instead of Zim.”

“Ugh, fine… Purple is- I’m his- I’m Purple’s grubling.”

“Grubling? What is that? Wait is he… Is Purple your dad?”

“Call it what you want… He didn’t want me anyway. Apparently, height isn’t genetic.”

Dib was somewhat lost for words. He knew from Zim that Irkens didn’t really have families so to speak, but this seemed to be a particularly sore spot for you. Maybe that was why you really wanted to turn against your race. Whatever the reason, Dib stuck out his hand for you to shake.

“What’s this?” You asked.

Dib grabbed your hand, showing you what to do, “I’ll help you get Zim’s ship, no matter how long it takes.”

“You will? Even though I’m an alien?”

Dib smiled empathetically, feeling relatively close to you on the subject of family relationship problems, “I’d say you’re more of an intergalactic traveller.”

Your lip turned up in a small smile, “Here’s to capturing Zim.”

“To capturing Zim.”


End file.
